Nothing much to say today really, hmm yeah.
Well i didnt get done in Critical Thinking cos about 5 other people hadn't done it and i handed in the peice of work i 'thought' we had been supposed to do...
And facebook seems to be working again,
*Deleted this part of the post cos i decided against it*
"Always look on the bright side of life"
Tuesday 26 January 2010
Monday 25 January 2010
"And i wanted you to know, that i love the way you laugh"
Well well here we are again, lying here wondering what to write in today's post. I usually do this when I'm bored and there's nothing else to do now. I came online to ask someone about the Critical Thinking homework for tomorrow, and they didn't know about it, so now i could either guess what to do or not do it. Both are very unwise options.. And as a side note: Critical Thinking is the worlds most crappiest subject (and i was gonna colour that red, but the colour bar has disappeared....
Sorry had to take a moment to make a confused face and double check the toolbar bit.
Well back to the blog, I'm going to blog your socks off dear readers, about pointless topics and in the unfortunate style of everyone Else's blog, depressing subjects probably.
Well lets start with that I'm really annoyed with myself, i was on bebo (hehe) because my facebook has exploded (more on that in a bit)and was posting on Sian's profile. The for some stupid reason, i clicked the "Show All Comments" butten and scrolled to the comments Ben posted while they where going out (Repetitive crap) but there was a picture of them hugging.. And for some reason this affected me, this kind of.. anger, jealousy? boiled up in me and i swiftly exited the web page. Although it was too late, i now have this image of them hugging, and the smile on her face. But what the fuck is wrong with me? they're not going out, they never speak, she hates him and tells me everyday how much she loves me. Ive never been a jealous person although i am prone to some paranoia's, so i dunno. I'm never going near that certain area again. And I'm going to give her a big hug tomorrow and tell her how much i love her. Because it will make be feel better. Don't get me wrong I'm not worried that they'll get back together or something cos i doubt that will ever happen. But, but its when i see a message from him from like four months ago expressing love or from her doing the same, or if she talks about what they did (although she hasn't done that for months now)i remember he telling me about sports day and them lying on the Field and how she was the happiest she's ever been, and it just makes me think "Well how do i beat that then? if it was the best." so then i get paranoid again for crap reasons. But me being me i think i can suss out a cause, everyone in a relationship fears the same, that the other may lose interest and leave. We don't acknowledge this feeling and push it to the back of our minds but it's always there. Hell I'm even worried id stop liking her, she's so amazingly lovely.
Wow, id better stop this it sounds like I'm having doubts, but I'm not I'm not at all. I love her more and more everyday and school just annoys me because people being about especially teachers means i cant express that love as much as i want too. Though i dint care if people see, teachers are weird about relationships in school; something i still don't understand.
Haha in fact this reminds me of a lovely dream i had about a week ago. In it Sian was round here and we decided to go for a walk (and we took the dog, bear in mind when i had this dream we did not own the dog we had only seen in in the kennels, yet it was in the dream anyway) but yeah it was summer and really warm and the ground was dry and grassy and we just lay on this hill and kissed and hugged and it was perfect. (The dog lay nearby with its lead pegged into the ground). I wish i could dream of her more often,and I've had some pretty messed up dreams before featuring people Ive only ever seen and never talked too.
Hmm well i think that's it apart from to say 'I Love You Sian!' in case she magically reads this or something haha.
Well onto the next bit, we got a dog this weekend too. Named 'Nell' she's a female German Shepherd cross Collie and is a very lovely dog. She already can 'Sit' 'lie down' and almost 'Heel'. Although she does have a tendencie to jump up at you if she's exited but we counter that by ignoring her (manual says too haha).
That's Her; She's a beautiful dog.
Oh yeah the facebook thing, its not much but my facebook is exploding, it wont let me post comments or go on note's! So i have been tagged in one and am yet to read it and people are commenting on mine but i cant read them either. It's frustrating to say the least.
There's so many depressing blogs around at the moment, its scary and saddening. Let me ask: How do you help someone who doesnt want to be helped? The answer, you don't. BUT that is a crap thing to do, everyone should help each other. And i've tried so hard.
Well that's all for now i think.
Song of the day hmm lets see; well i really like this song, has a great tune and is fun to sing along too. And the song applies to a few people. The whole first paragraph applies to one lovely person. But also line two applies to someone too.
"And I wanted you to know, that i love the way you laugh,
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain away,
I keep your photograph, and i know it serves me well,
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain,
Cos im broken, when im lonesome,
And i dont feel right, when you're gone away.."
'Broken' by Seether feat Amy Lee
Apologies for spelling errors, i can't be bothered to check it all.
Sorry had to take a moment to make a confused face and double check the toolbar bit.
Well back to the blog, I'm going to blog your socks off dear readers, about pointless topics and in the unfortunate style of everyone Else's blog, depressing subjects probably.
Well lets start with that I'm really annoyed with myself, i was on bebo (hehe) because my facebook has exploded (more on that in a bit)and was posting on Sian's profile. The for some stupid reason, i clicked the "Show All Comments" butten and scrolled to the comments Ben posted while they where going out (Repetitive crap) but there was a picture of them hugging.. And for some reason this affected me, this kind of.. anger, jealousy? boiled up in me and i swiftly exited the web page. Although it was too late, i now have this image of them hugging, and the smile on her face. But what the fuck is wrong with me? they're not going out, they never speak, she hates him and tells me everyday how much she loves me. Ive never been a jealous person although i am prone to some paranoia's, so i dunno. I'm never going near that certain area again. And I'm going to give her a big hug tomorrow and tell her how much i love her. Because it will make be feel better. Don't get me wrong I'm not worried that they'll get back together or something cos i doubt that will ever happen. But, but its when i see a message from him from like four months ago expressing love or from her doing the same, or if she talks about what they did (although she hasn't done that for months now)i remember he telling me about sports day and them lying on the Field and how she was the happiest she's ever been, and it just makes me think "Well how do i beat that then? if it was the best." so then i get paranoid again for crap reasons. But me being me i think i can suss out a cause, everyone in a relationship fears the same, that the other may lose interest and leave. We don't acknowledge this feeling and push it to the back of our minds but it's always there. Hell I'm even worried id stop liking her, she's so amazingly lovely.
Wow, id better stop this it sounds like I'm having doubts, but I'm not I'm not at all. I love her more and more everyday and school just annoys me because people being about especially teachers means i cant express that love as much as i want too. Though i dint care if people see, teachers are weird about relationships in school; something i still don't understand.
Haha in fact this reminds me of a lovely dream i had about a week ago. In it Sian was round here and we decided to go for a walk (and we took the dog, bear in mind when i had this dream we did not own the dog we had only seen in in the kennels, yet it was in the dream anyway) but yeah it was summer and really warm and the ground was dry and grassy and we just lay on this hill and kissed and hugged and it was perfect. (The dog lay nearby with its lead pegged into the ground). I wish i could dream of her more often,and I've had some pretty messed up dreams before featuring people Ive only ever seen and never talked too.
Hmm well i think that's it apart from to say 'I Love You Sian!' in case she magically reads this or something haha.
Well onto the next bit, we got a dog this weekend too. Named 'Nell' she's a female German Shepherd cross Collie and is a very lovely dog. She already can 'Sit' 'lie down' and almost 'Heel'. Although she does have a tendencie to jump up at you if she's exited but we counter that by ignoring her (manual says too haha).
That's Her; She's a beautiful dog.
Oh yeah the facebook thing, its not much but my facebook is exploding, it wont let me post comments or go on note's! So i have been tagged in one and am yet to read it and people are commenting on mine but i cant read them either. It's frustrating to say the least.
There's so many depressing blogs around at the moment, its scary and saddening. Let me ask: How do you help someone who doesnt want to be helped? The answer, you don't. BUT that is a crap thing to do, everyone should help each other. And i've tried so hard.
Well that's all for now i think.
Song of the day hmm lets see; well i really like this song, has a great tune and is fun to sing along too. And the song applies to a few people. The whole first paragraph applies to one lovely person. But also line two applies to someone too.
"And I wanted you to know, that i love the way you laugh,
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain away,
I keep your photograph, and i know it serves me well,
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain,
Cos im broken, when im lonesome,
And i dont feel right, when you're gone away.."
'Broken' by Seether feat Amy Lee
Apologies for spelling errors, i can't be bothered to check it all.
Friday 15 January 2010
Just felt like writing something, emotional :L
“Throughout life people will make you mad, disrespect you and treat you bad. Let fate deal with the things they do, because hate in your heart will consume you too.”
Life's not perfect, we all know that. Yet each of us should strive to make it as good for the next person as possible. Go out of our way just slightly to help that extra person. Not in the silly ways people like teachers put it like holding doors and saying thanks. No this is deeper, the very inner workings of human emotion. We should strive to ensure those around us are at least content with the world. If they're not, we should at least attempt to help them, and sometimes even trying to listen to what the helper is trying to say can make so much difference. If we are unable to help those most in need, we should question ourselves to perceive the answer.
To taunt and upset purposefully will eventually rot your core until there is nothing but a stone cold shell from which the only emotion is hate and disgust. But likewise to give up on yourself, or on those who love you most is another form of inner corruption. The kind that will leave you alone in the dark, the kind that will turn the world grey and the food to ash. These events cannot be undone, so for those who strive to reach the light as all human beings do, do not follow the path to despair. If things are not working, find ways to fix them. If people are not helping, do not look to them for help but instead turn to those you will give you it straight from their hearts. Look at the world today, the earthquakes that kill millions and destroy families and relationships, do not give up on life until you have suffered as they have suffered and bled as they have bled. Not the petty self-inflicted wounds of an attention seeking individual crying out for help but too afraid to ask for it. But the blood of family that stains your shirt, the remains of children you cradle in your arms. Only then at the end of all things you may lie down and die. But they don't, something keeps them going, forces greater then any upon this earth, forces science cannot understand and humanity cannot control; Love and Hope. So embrace these feelings, wrap yourself in them and hold them tight. If your life is good, take a look around and see the others who have suffered to create that life for you, for there is always someone in the shadows, calling out to you.
Life's not perfect, we all know that. Yet each of us should strive to make it as good for the next person as possible. Go out of our way just slightly to help that extra person. Not in the silly ways people like teachers put it like holding doors and saying thanks. No this is deeper, the very inner workings of human emotion. We should strive to ensure those around us are at least content with the world. If they're not, we should at least attempt to help them, and sometimes even trying to listen to what the helper is trying to say can make so much difference. If we are unable to help those most in need, we should question ourselves to perceive the answer.
To taunt and upset purposefully will eventually rot your core until there is nothing but a stone cold shell from which the only emotion is hate and disgust. But likewise to give up on yourself, or on those who love you most is another form of inner corruption. The kind that will leave you alone in the dark, the kind that will turn the world grey and the food to ash. These events cannot be undone, so for those who strive to reach the light as all human beings do, do not follow the path to despair. If things are not working, find ways to fix them. If people are not helping, do not look to them for help but instead turn to those you will give you it straight from their hearts. Look at the world today, the earthquakes that kill millions and destroy families and relationships, do not give up on life until you have suffered as they have suffered and bled as they have bled. Not the petty self-inflicted wounds of an attention seeking individual crying out for help but too afraid to ask for it. But the blood of family that stains your shirt, the remains of children you cradle in your arms. Only then at the end of all things you may lie down and die. But they don't, something keeps them going, forces greater then any upon this earth, forces science cannot understand and humanity cannot control; Love and Hope. So embrace these feelings, wrap yourself in them and hold them tight. If your life is good, take a look around and see the others who have suffered to create that life for you, for there is always someone in the shadows, calling out to you.
Monday 4 January 2010
I Seem to have forgotten to blog :L
This Will be corrected shortly, i hope...
Hmm i could just do a list of things that've happened to save time, yeah.
So between now and my last blog i can remember ive:
Hmm i could just do a list of things that've happened to save time, yeah.
So between now and my last blog i can remember ive:
- Argued some more with Ben, the prat.
- Had christmas, i got a purple i-pod! its beautiful.
- Hmm had a new years party (and new year) we broke our cousins bed.. that sounds wrong its ok we sat down a bit hard and the slats snapped. Umm yeah my cousin was amazingly drunk, which was amusing. She fell out the window onto the garage roof though, which was scary...
- Said some stupid stuff to someone, then regretted it and apologised, i wonder if they forgave me though..
- Went to my girlfriends, which was the highlight of the holidays by far, i think her mum should leave us alone in the house more often.. hehe
- Bought a new hoodie from Topman in carlisle, its purple!
"Im missing you so much, il say you die tonght,
Just so i can get to you before the sun will rise,
I know these times are hard and i feel this too,
But non of that ever seems to matter when i'm holding you,
And i'm wasting away, away from you.."
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